Transparency refers to the free flow of information between a couple, nothing hidden, no half-truths, or white lies “to avoid the worst” supposedly. There is sincerity in the information as well as in the expression of thoughts. One doesn’t have to be pressure or investigate the other because the information is offered with anticipation.
This transparency should be practiced in everything between the couple: phone calls, access to cell phones, e-mails, computers, internet history, the use of money, trips, meetings with others on the absence of their spouse etc. It shouldn’t be used to control their partner, but as a healthy practice in marriage. I emphasize, this should practice needs to exist between any married couples, whether there has been a betrayal or not. Of course this becomes even more important after a betrayal.
A few steps to consider in order for there to be transparency:
1. Always speak the truth
2. Encourage the other to speak the truth through your balanced reactions when this happens, even if the truth will be unpleasant
3. Let opposing views be expressed: be open to different opinions that the other may have. Everybody doesn’t think alike and this doesn’t have to be a problem
4. Have unpleasant conversations: don’t avoid the subject just because it’s hard
5. Be open-minded to hear people with authority on the subject. This helps you to inform yourself on the subjects so that your opinions are based on facts that are acceptable by capable people — in other words, it’s not just your personal opinion
6. Admit your mistakes
